Double Negative
by redskiez
Summary: As is tradition, Tobi goes to ask Deidara if he wants to join him for lunch. He finds him sulking by a stream.


"Alright, Mr. Zetsu!" comes Tobi's rather annoying voice, causing such a ruckus through the forest that it seems like a miracle that the wildlife surrounding him didn't bolt at the sound.

He falls quiet after that, looking around him.

Deidara is around here somewhere.

Tobi pretends to be clueless, stumbling around the forest and making enough noise for Deidara to hear him a mile away. Still, he doesn't hear anything.

It is unlike Deidara to be so quiet when he knows Tobi is near. He will either hear a familiar shouting or an irritated call of his name. Something must be wrong.

He breaks through the thickets and is greeted with the gentle sound of a small stream. There are fishes in there, breaking through the surface in a spectacular arch, only to dip back into the water without so much as a splash.

Tobi turns his gaze and finds Deidara sitting on a rock, staring into the water.

"What is so interesting, senpai?" Tobi asks, pipping up loudly.

Deidara doesn't respond.

Tobi tilts his head. Something is definitely wrong. He steps out of the bush he's in and heads over to the newest member of the Akatsuki, leaning down to peer at his expression.

For two seconds, Deidara doesn't move. Then, he feels his hand press against his cheek, shoving his face away.

"Go away, hm," Deidara mumbles.

"Senpai is upset," Tobi remarks, grasping Deidara's wrist and sitting down next to him.

"It's none of your business," Deidara says, turning to Tobi. "What are you doing here, yeah?"

"I wanted to ask senpai if you wanted to have lunch together again," Tobi says.

"I'm not in the mood," Deidara says, looking back at the stream.

"What's wrong, senpai?" Tobi asks, crawling closer to Deidara.

Deidara ignores him.

"Senpai?" Tobi says. "If there's something on your mind, you can talk to me. A lot of people say that I am a good listener, even though I talk so much. Surprising, huh?"

Deidara doesn't say anything.

"Well, Zetsu always talks to me. He tells me about everything – his problems, his day, his meals."

Deidara is quiet.

"Sometimes, even Kisame tells me about things, like his most recent meal, his most recent mission, how Itachi is doing."

Deidara twitches.

"Oh, Kisame told me a lot about Itachi the other day. He was really mad that Itachi didn't want to turn off his Sharingan and he nearly fainted! It's sad, really. He's really talented."

Deidara finally turns to face Tobi, glaring at him.

"Do you want to die, Tobi, yeah?"

"If that's what it takes for senpai to talk to me, then yes."

"Why do you care?"

"Senpai is my friend," Tobi says, sounding as though it's the most obvious thing in the world. "If there's anything bothering me, I would tell senpai, so if there's something bothering you, senpai, you can tell me."

Deidara falls quiet once more and returns his gaze to the water.

Tobi can sense that he's made some sort of breakthrough, so he remains quiet. He sits there until Deidara finally speaks up.

"It was Sasori, hm," Deidara mumbles.

Tobi keeps quiet out of respect but he can feel the rage beginning to boil his blood.

"Ah, it was the usual," Deidara tries to say and Tobi reaches out to place a hand on his forearm. Deidara falls silent and then he clears his throat. "He, um, he threatened to turn me into one of his puppets, hm, just to rub it into my face that art is eternal by making me inhabit a body that directly contradicts my art."

Tobi's grip on his arm tightens a little.

"I thought he was just making those idle threats again, hm," he says, "you've heard him before. He's always just talk, yeah, so I didn't think anything of it. But then he threw a fucking kunai in my face, hm."

Tobi winces at the thought.

"Yeah," Deidara mumbles. "He even told me that he'd rather have Itachi as a partner, hm."

Despite Obito being in the belief that Deidara must have said something to entice the living puppet's anger, Tobi thinks that discourse among partners is wholly unnecessary. He dislikes Kakuzu and Hidan the most, the two of them are almost always arguing with each other over the smallest of things.

Despite all of that, Obito still finds himself saying, "what an asshole."

Deidara turns to him, surprised.

"Tobi," he says.

"Sorry," Tobi shrugs. "It's just that he shouldn't have said anything like that."

Tobi stands up and nudges Deidara. He resists for a second before relenting, moving over to the other side of the rock to make space for Tobi. Tobi sits down next to Deidara, wrapping his arm around his shoulder.

"Senpai is really talented," he says. "Everyone's view on art and perfection is different."

"Please don't say your view on art and perfection is me," Deidara grumbles.

"What if it is?" Tobi laughs.

"I'm going to kill you, hm."

"Oh, senpai," Tobi hums, reaching with his other arm to pull Deidara in a rather awkward hug, given both of their positions, "please don't listen to what Sasori said. He's just a grumpy piece of wood."

Deidara barks out a laugh and slowly begins to return Tobi's embrace. He even feels him turning his head to bury his face in his neck.

"I'm going to find some termites and leave them in his room tonight," Tobi says.

"Don't do that," Deidara says, sounding not at all against the idea. "He's going to think I did it, hm."

"He won't be able to move by the time he figures out what happened," Tobi says.

"You do know he doesn't sleep, right, Tobi?"

"Is that why you're always tired after missions?"

"None of your business, hm."

"I'm going to give that man a stern talking to," Tobi says, moving to let go of Deidara, but he finds that he cannot move. Deidara is not letting him go. He feels his fingers grip his shirt tighter and Deidara presses his face closer to him.

"Don't," Deidara mumbles against his turtleneck.

"Senpai?"

"Don't move."

Tobi sits there, letting the situation sink in before he reaches to wrap his arms around Deidara again. He feels him relax.

Feeling bold, Tobi turns his head and presses the side of his masked face on top of Deidara's head. The two of them sit together like this as the stream continues to trickle beside them, the only thing tipping him off of the passage of time.

"Does senpai feel better now?" Tobi asks after a while.

"Hm," Deidara grunts.

Tobi rubs soothing circles between Deidara's shoulder blades, idly trying to get rid of any kinks in his muscles.

A moment later, when Tobi's arm becomes tired, he tries again, "is senpai hungry? Do you want to have … I think it's teatime now, senpai. Do you want to have tea?"

Deidara nods against his neck.

Tobi waits for him to let go and sit up so that they can hurry before even teatime is over.

And he waits.

And waits.

And waits.

* * *

Hey guys, Red here!

This is beta'd by AO3 user Dani_ATN.

Anonymous said:  
I feel like as the youngest member Deidara gets a lot of shit from the others especially considering how he was arrogant and kind of fucked up with Itachi? Would love to see Obito defending him/making him feel better if you're still taking prompts [heart]

I finished this yesterday at work at the same time as _Color Me_. It was so sweet that I made myself smile for the longest time. I hope I didn't freak the coworker sitting next to me out.

This is dedicated to the anon that sent me the prompt. I hope you enjoyed it, anon!

Follow me on Tumblr (redskiez dot tumblr dot com) for some side-content and if you want to make me write something for you, too, you can shoot me an ask with the prompt idea. Only taking T/ObiDei prompts, as always, but I will write almost everything. Almost. I'll tell you if I'm uncomfortable with something. If you have an AO3 or FFN account, you should say so in the ask if you want me to dedicate/gift this to you.

If you enjoyed this (or didn't), please leave a review telling me why and which parts! Thanks for reading!


End file.
